Writing the Wrong
by wellwritten
Summary: Castle learns their first case wasn't the first time he'd come into contact with Kate Beckett.  Mind the revised rating.
1. Chapter 1

Writing the Wrong

_Author's Note: Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoy. I own my imagination and the laptop on which I write, but nothing else involving the world of Castle._

Chapter 1

He pulled a leather bound binder from the top of his study bookshelf, looking for a distraction from writing.

As a New York Times bestselling author, he had received letters from fans for years, often from young writers looking for advice or women looking for a good time, but every once in a while, he received letters that touched his heart. For Father's Day one year, Alexis had bought him the leather bound binder to keep the special letters, and there they lived tucked safely away.

Castle set the binder down on his desk and started turning pages. After the first line or two he recalled the crux of the note, smiled and moved on to the next page. After about twenty minutes, he stopped sharp a couple of lines down one particular letter. He knew this handwriting. He started at the top again, noting the date and read the letter again, this time in a whole new context.

_Dear Mr. Castle,_

_I'm not sure why I'm writing this letter. I know nothing can change what's happened. My mother is dead. This is the first time I've written those words and though they are hard to write, they're even harder to read. She was killed, though we don't know what happened or why. I think that makes it even harder._

_My mother loved your books. I found a few of them in her room under her bed. I've gotten in the habit of taking her pillow to my room, wrapping up in her bathrobe and reading them. I know it's not going to bring her back but it makes me feel closer to her._

_Though it hurts to accept it, I know the smells will fade from her pillow and robe, but you're still here and hopefully, will continue to write. Your books give me hope that we will find some justice, some closure to her death._

_You'll probably never even read this but I wanted to let you know that your books are for some, like me, more than just entertainment. They're hope for the future, hope that every day won't hurt as much as it does now. _

_Sincerely,_

_Katherine Beckett_

Castle couldn't do anything but stare at the brief note. He knew he'd read the letter before, but that was before he had known Kate. He leaned back in his chair and tried to process it all. His Kate, who he knew so well, and yes, in his mind he could admit that he loved, had been in so much pain. She'd reached out to him, which was so incredibly not like her, and exposed her heart. Did she remember writing it? Did she feel that kind of deep pain when she thought about her mother?

"Richard, I'm heading out," Martha stuck her head in her son's office but paused once she could tell he wasn't paying attention.

"Richard?"

"What?" Castle looked up.

"Is everything okay?"

He shook his head and motioned for her to come to his desk. "Read this."

After a few moments, Martha placed her hand on her chest. "Oh my goodness, Poor Kate."

"I didn't know mother," he whispered, the look of guilt obvious on his normally happy face.

"Of course, you didn't. You couldn't have, but it touched you, even then, right? You saved it."

"Yeah, but I should have made the connection."

"Richard, her mother was killed and this letter was sent long before you met her."

"I know." Castle stared at the letter, "What do I do?"

"Go talk to her."

"And say what?"

"You're the wordsmith of the family, I'm sure you'll come up with just the right thing."

To be continued…

_Reviews are greatly appreciated!_


	2. Chapter 2

Writing the Wrong

_Author's Note: Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoy. I own my imagination and the laptop on which I write, but nothing else involving the world of Castle._

From last time…

"Richard, her mother was killed and this letter was sent long before you met her."

"I know." Castle stared at the letter, "What do I do?"

"Go talk to her."

"And say what?"

"You're the wordsmith of the family, I'm sure you'll come up with just the right thing."

Now on with the story…

Chapter 2

Kate Beckett rarely enjoyed a quiet Saturday afternoon, normally due to a case she was working. Even if there was no police business to handle, she usually ran errands, paid bills, or cleaned her apartment. This week however, she was taking the afternoon off, to read.

Coffee steaming at her side, she burrowed under the blanket, pulled her legs up under her and opened the latest James Patterson mystery, and after a relaxing sigh, began to read.

At page eight, her bliss was interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Castle?"

"Hey Beckett, do you mind if I come in for a minute?" He walked past her wearing typical weekend wear, jeans and a sweater, but carried a large binder under his arm.

"There's no need to be jealous, Castle."

The question interrupted his contemplative state, "What?"

Beckett smiled and motioned to the book she'd been reading, which was splayed so the picture of his author friend was hard to miss.

"You're reading! I should have called first, I'm sorry Kate."

"I'm just teasing, are you okay? You seem upset."

Castle followed her toward the seating area, "I need you to sit down."

Kate sat back where she had been reading and watched as he sat across from her on the other sofa. "What's wrong? You're making me nervous. Is it Alexis? Martha?"

"No, but I need to show you something."

"Okay."

He laid the large book on the coffee table facing her and flipped the pages to the one he wanted to show her.

Kate recognized the letter and leaned closer to read it.

"Kate, I didn't know I had this. I saved my favorite letters in the binder and it's been up on the shelf. I just pulled it down today."

"Wow, I barely remember writing this." Kate said softly, brushing her fingers against the protective plastic sleeve.

"If I had known that I had it—" He tried to explain, rationalize, something, anything.

"What? What could you have done, Rick?" she asked gently.

"I don't know, but I should have done something!" The frustration was evident from his voice.

Kate pulled the letter out of the sleeve and showed him the envelope that had been attached to the back. "Look, there was no return address. Even if you had wanted to do something then, you couldn't have. That's not what I needed anyway. Writing this was just a healthy first step in dealing with my mother's death."

"What was it like after she died?"

She took a deep breath. A simple question but not such an easy answer. "It was like Dad and I had died too, but we were still there. We still had to eat, pay bills, work, study. Burying myself in the books helped me. I could pretend I was another person in another time."

Castle got up from the sofa across from her and came to sit next to her, and put his hand over one of hers.

"Dad didn't get out of bed for several days. I tried to be mom. I cooked and cleaned, I tried to make it all seem normal, but then I'd go in my room and cry. I cried for hours, day after day. But, after a while the emotions became less raw. But I remember the house was _so_ quiet."

"Is that when your Dad started drinking?"

Beckett pulled her hand away from Castle's, stood up and started pacing her small apartment.

"Kate, I'm sorry, I just want to help. I want to understand."

"He started drinking the afternoon we returned from the funeral. We had some family in, but no one knew what to say. He went back to their bedroom with a bottle and didn't come out until the next morning. After a week, I went back to school and we talked from time to time, and I thought he was doing okay, but he wasn't. He was going to work, and on the outside, doing fine, but every night, he'd take a bottle to bed and drown out the silence," she paused and gave a half smile. "That's what he would say. Katie, I'm fine, I just need to drown out the silence. It's so damn loud."

Kate smiled sadly and sat back down on the couch next to Castle. "But, as you've seen, he's doing much better now. Though I do still worry about him."

"He's not drinking again, is he?"

"No, but he still seems kind of sad sometimes, or maybe it's loneliness. I think maybe he needs to go out with friends or join a bowling league or something."

"I don't really see your dad as the bowling type."

She laughed, "No, me neither."

"So," Castle motioned to the letter, "we're okay then?"

"Of course! Actually, more than anything, I'm impressed you still have it. The Richard Castle I met three years ago wouldn't have taken valuable time from signing autographs on women's chests to have saved this letter."

"But I did, you just didn't know that side of me," Rick said as he walked to her front door.

"I wonder what other sides of you I have left to learn." She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. "Bye, Castle. See you Monday."

To be continued….

_Reviews are greatly appreciated!_


	3. Chapter 3

Writing the Wrong

_Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews, alerts, etc. I own my imagination and the laptop on which I write, but nothing else involving the world of Castle._

_From last time…_

"_Of course! Actually, more than anything, I'm impressed you still have it. The Richard Castle I met three years ago wouldn't have taken valuable time from signing autographs on women's chests to have saved this letter."_

"_But I did, you just didn't know that side of me," Rick said as he walked to her front door._

"_I wonder what other sides of you I have left to learn." She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. "Bye, Castle. See you Monday."_

Now on with the story…

Chapter 3

Monday morning started out as usual for Kate Beckett with a lengthy visit to the 12th Precinct gym. After an invigorating workout with a weighted bag, Kate wiped the sweat from her neck and forehead and then read the new text on her cell phone.

_Coffee and pastry will be delivered to your desk at 7a, but I won't be in today_

Genuinely disappointed, but not willing to let him know that she texted back, _I'll try to get along without you, is everything okay?_

_Don't miss me too much detective! Yes, but have been writing all night and want to keep going._

A similar message arrived the next day, and the next day after that. In fact, by the end of the day Thursday, Kate still hadn't seen Castle. She debated running by his loft to check on him, and after changing her mind back and forth several times, finally found herself ringing his doorbell.

"Kate! Hello darling, we were just talking about you!" Martha stepped back out of the door to let Kate come in.

Though Kate assumed the other person she meant was Castle, Jim Beckett was the person sitting on the sofa, his arm relaxed against the back.

"Dad? What are you doing here? Where's Castle?"

Martha answered, "Don't worry, kiddo, he's been holed up in his office since Saturday, working just about non-stop. And, I invited your dad to go with me to a new play I've been dying to see. In fact, we were just discussing our personal opinions on the play, and the cast, of course. Come join us!"

"Um, that's okay, you guys go ahead. I'm going to interrupt Castle for a second."

Kate opened Rick's office door without knocking and closed it behind her without making a peep. He was wholly focused on what he was doing and either didn't look up or just chose to ignore her.

"Castle?"

"Kate!" he looked up suddenly, and just as quickly shut the lid to his laptop, "What are you doing here?"

"Here's a better question. Why is my dad munching on cheese and crackers with your mother in your living room?"

"He is?"

"Yes, he is!"

"I don't know, did you ask him?" Rick said as he stood and walked around the desk. With a gentle hand at her waist, he guided Kate out of his office and back into the living room. "Jim, how nice to see you again!"

"Rick! You too! Martha was worried you were never coming out."

As the two men shook hands, Rick could feel Kate rolling her eyes, which he ignored.

"She does tend to over worry, but isn't that what you would expect from a doting mother?"

The eye roll came from the woman dramatically perched on the sofa on the other side of the room this time.

"Richard, make Kate stay and visit with us!"

"Unfortunately, Mother, Kate was just leaving."

"I was?"

"Yes, you know how it is, the work of a police detective for the fine city of New York is never done."

Jim and Martha both smiled and nodded and watched Castle escort Kate to the front door.

He stepped out into the hall, physically guiding her out of his apartment. "I'm going to hug you now. I'm only warning you so you don't slam me down to the floor."

Kate, who was still confused by him very politely, but very definitely throwing her out of his apartment accepted the hug, and hugged back.

"I'm sorry this is taking a little longer than I thought, but as soon as I'm done, I'll let you know."

The quick kiss on the lips came and went so fast she couldn't respond and his smirk told her he'd planned it that way. "Goodnight, Kate," he said, before giving one of those boyishly handsome smiles and closing the door, leaving Kate standing there with even more questions than when she'd arrived.

To be continued…

_Reviews, comments, and whatever else you want to share are appreciated!_


	4. Chapter 4

Writing the Wrong

_Author's Note: Castle's not mine, but I'll put them back when I'm done playing._

_From last time…_

_Kate, who was still confused by him very politely, but very definitely throwing her out of his apartment accepted the hug, and hugged back. _

"_I'm sorry this is taking a little longer than I thought, but as soon as I'm done, I'll let you know."_

_The quick kiss on the lips came and went so fast she couldn't respond and his smirk told her he'd planned it that way. "Goodnight, Kate," he said, before giving one of those boyishly handsome smiles and closing the door, leaving Kate standing there with even more questions than when she'd arrived._

Chapter 4

In the darkness of his study, with only the desk lamp to illuminate the room, Richard Castle studied the item on his desk, a hardback book with leather binding and a smooth dark red cover. He trailed his finger along the spine and then across the cover_. _

The outside of the book didn't overly concern him, though it was aesthetically pleasing. It was the inside that mattered. The words had flowed from him, almost faster than he could type them. He was satisfied with the final result, but his opinion wasn't the one that mattered.

oooooo

"Detective Beckett?"

Kate looked up from reviewing case notes and with raised eyebrows, responded to the young officer who had interrupted, "Yes?"

"This package came in for you."

"Thanks!" Kate called to the young girl and studied the large square box wrapped with thick red ribbon and topped with a bow.

The station was relatively quiet, so with only a quick look around, she tugged on the ribbon and opened the box then set the lid to the side and brushed aside the tissue paper to reveal what appeared to be a robe. 100% Cashmere, the satin tag revealed. She didn't have to guess who sent the extravagant gift but she couldn't resist running her fingers down the front to feel the soft luxury. Her hand encountered something solid, which turned out to be a book nestled inside, with a card tucked in the front cover.

_Kate,_

_I've finished the writing that's been keeping me away. Go tell the Captain you need to take the afternoon off and take it home. Please call me when you've finished reading it, regardless of the time._

_C_

She pulled out the book, which from the outside looked nothing like his other novels. There was no cover with a naked silhouette, no picture of Richard Castle on the back enticing the reader to enjoy his book but instead a rich leather cover with the title in gold embossed letters, _Strong Enough_, across the front_._

She started reading. The tone and flow were similar to Castle's other books, which wasn't overly surprising but without the summary on the book cover, she had to depend on the work itself to set the stage. After about three pages, she slammed the cover closed and threw it back in the gift box. She grabbed her bag and coat, and picked up the box. After a quick stop at the Captain's office, she raced out of the precinct, clutching the package that held a book whose main character was unmistakably fashioned after Johanna Beckett, but very much alive.

oooooo

Kate sat in the window seat, staring out of the casement window she'd cracked open. She hugged herself, wrapped in the robe that Castle had included with the book. It smelled like him, but only faintly, but she took a deep breath to remind herself of his cologne. As he had likely intended, it felt like Castle was holding her, but also reminded her of the time after her mother's death when her robe had served as a lifeline.

It had been twenty-four hours since the package had arrived at the station. She'd sat down and read the book as soon as she'd walked into her apartment last night. Then cried, sobbed, through all the emotions that ran uncontrolled through her mind and heart. Then she read it again, nestled in the robe. Castle had called and texted, she assumed because she hadn't called him yet, but beyond a brief note to the Captain for more time off, she'd had no other contact with the outside world. She needed to process it all.

Castle had created a new character whose name was Hannah Strong. Hannah was a lawyer for a grassroots environmental agency and wasn't afraid to ruffle a few feathers to make sure the loopholes that businesses tried to sneak through were monitored, and when they weren't, she made sure to let the public know. The plot revealed how Hannah had discovered that she had been marked for murder and how, with Nikki Heat and Jamison Rook's help, she apprehended the mob kingpin who was trying to kill her. There were so many details of the character that matched Kate's mother, even to some of her favorite expressions and mannerisms, a few that she had forgotten which brought the pain of her absence crashing like waves against her soul.

Nikki Heat's mother had already received her own plotline and Kate appreciated Castle not changing the backstory. Unless they knew her personally, his readers weren't likely to catch on that Hannah was really Johanna. Why didn't he tell her he was writing another Nikki Heat? Why was it printed and bound with the leather cover?

The story was amazing, another stellar work from Richard Castle, writer extraordinaire, but there were still questions left unanswered. After all the emotions filtered through, she needed to read the book again, this time through the objective eye of a detective. But first, she picked up her phone and texted Lanie. _Can you text writer boy and tell him I'm fine, just processing and I'll talk to him soon._

_Are you fine?_ Lanie texted back, and then, _What are you processing?_

_I'll tell you soon, just let Castle know so he stops bugging me, please?_

And with that accomplished, she started reading the book for the third time.

oooooo

Not even Alexis' happy chatter and his mother's dramatic explanation of some travesty at the theater could hold his full attention this evening. Though Lanie's text had settled him to some degree, he wished he could have watched Kate read the book to see the emotion wash across her face firsthand.

That thought made him stop and smile. In his mind he could hear Kate tell him to stop staring, that it was creepy.

"Richard!"

"Huh? What?" He looked up at his mother who must have been trying to get his attention without success.

"Where'd you go?"

"I'm here now, what's up?"

"I'm going out," she gestured grandly to the door, "and Alexis is going up," and then waved toward the stairs. "Will you be okay?"

He stood and kissed his mother on the cheek. "Of course, mother. Have a good night. Tell Jim I said hello."

"I didn't say who I was going out with."

He smiled, "I have decades of experience recognizing the 'I'm so excited, he might be the one' face."

She paused and gazed at him sadly, "It wasn't that bad, was it, your growing up with me?"

"I wouldn't have traded it for the world." He leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. "Go on, have fun."

Martha cupped his cheek and blinked the tears that had formed and nodded. "I do love you, Richard."

"I know you do. I love you too, Mother."

As she pulled the door behind her, he heard his mother talking in the hall and then watched as the door opened again. "Look who I found, Richard! I guess you can have your own fun now," she said with a wink and then resumed her evening out.

"Kate?" he asked, almost as if he didn't believe she was actually standing there.

"Hi, Castle."

"Come in, come in. Can I get you a drink? Some wine or a beer?" He hurried to the kitchen, mainly to cover his unusual lack of confidence and waited for her response.

"Castle?"

Her expression was so serious and her tone said you know why I'm here, why are you pretending that you don't? In response, he shut the refrigerator door and walked to the sofa and motioned for her to join him.

The silence was deafening.

The last thing he expected happened next. Kate sat down next to him on the sofa, then leaned over and kissed him. Not a peck, not a platonic thank you kiss. A soft but opened lip kiss followed by her hands on his neck pulling him closer. Before he could catch up, however, she pulled back.

"So tell me, Castle, how long have you been in love with me?"

To be continued….

_Reviews are always appreciated!_


	5. Chapter 5

Writing the Wrong

_Author's Note: Last chapter! Thank you so much for reading! I own nothing._

_From last time…_

_The last thing he expected happened next. Kate scooted closer to him on the sofa and turned to face him then leaned forward and kissed him. Not a peck, not a platonic thank you kiss. A soft but opened lip kiss followed by her hands on his neck pulling him closer. Before he could catch up, however, she pulled back._

"_So tell me, Rick, how long have you been in love with me?"_

Chapter 5

He didn't waiver, he didn't blink, but delivered a completely straight-faced, "How do you know that I am?"

She smiled and reached back to pull the book out of her bag. "Because your love letter tells me so."

Castle looked down at his hands, and peeked back up, "Did you like it?"

"Are you going to answer my question?"

"For a long, long time. Before Josh, before Demming."

"I loved the story," she responded. "You gave me something I've been searching for for over ten years. Closure. I still want to, but I don't know if we'll ever find her killer but I think this," she held the book up in her hands for emphasis, "gives her new life, and will let Dad and I move on."

"After I read the letter in the scrapbook, I felt so guilty. You're my best friend and I knew her loss was profound. But in typical Castle fashion, I teased you and annoyed you without regard for all the pain you went through. I felt like I had let you down."

"But in typical Castle fashion, you also supported me, saved my life on numerous occasions, made me laugh…made me eat."

"I'm really glad you liked the book," Rick said looking down at his hands once again.

A pregnant pause settled over the room, leaving Beckett a bit perplexed.

"That's it?"

"I'm sorry, did you want that drink now?"

"Castle?" the confusion was etched across her face.

"What?"

"You admitted that you loved me! Don't you want to know how I feel about you?"

"Not really, no."

Another pause lingered as she studied his face, but she found no evidence of any emotion, love or otherwise. He looked stoic, which was unusual.

"Do you want me to go?"

He didn't answer. The man that had a witty response for every occasion couldn't be bothered to even answer her question? This was not how she had expected this visit to end.

"Ok," she said quietly, picked up her bag and headed toward the door, trying to process what had been said and where the conversation had gone wrong.

She pulled his front door toward her but before she could step through, felt the door slam closed and her body turned and pushed flat against the inside of the door. His lips were on hers and the hand that wasn't caressing her body pulled the bag from her shoulder and dropped it on the ground.

His lips travelled from her mouth along her jaw and down her neck and she heard his whisper of 'please don't go' over and over.

"Rick, wait," she moaned as he did magical things with his tongue at the base of her neck.

He moaned in return but pulled back, resting his forehead on her shoulder.

"Look at me."

He braced both arms against the door on either side of her head and gave her the eye contact she'd requested.

"I'm in love with you too, ok? I love you, too," she whispered and nodded, and smiled when he nodded in return, the relief evident on his face.

He leaned in again but much softer this time, with less frantic nips which produced much longer moans. After a few minutes, he drew back, reached down for her bag and then pulled her into his bedroom. He stopped long enough to shut the double doors that served as the entry for the master suite, but didn't stop at all after that.

CCCCCCCCC

In a mess of sheets and feet, the couple was spooned together in a haze of pleasant exhaustion.

"Kate?"

"Hmm?" she uttered, eyes closed but holding on to the forearm that was wrapped around her.

"I'm claiming you as mine now. I just want you to know."

"Okay, Mr. Caveman. Just remember that I can break any of your limbs if you try to pull me by the hair."

"I just stood by while you dated all those other men."

"There were only three."

"There were four."

"I thought you didn't know about—"

"I did."

"So I'm yours now?"

"Yes, and don't tease, I'm serious. I hated myself for never stepping forward and telling you how I felt, but I'm not going to be the nice guy that stays out of the way from now on."

Kate turned in his arms and wrapped her arms around him. "I knew you wanted me, but I didn't know it was anything more than lust."

"It's been love for quite a while."

She leaned up to kiss his chin and then snuggled back in. "So that means if I see any blonde women hanging all over you I can remove them as I see fit?"

"Yes, please do."

The couple napped for a while, both incredibly happy with the turn of events, but Kate woke a little later with another thought on her mind.

"Rick?"

"Hmm?"

"About the book? When is it going to be published?"

"It's not, unless you ask me to. It's yours. There's only the one copy."

"Thank you for writing it."

"You're welcome," he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you, Kate."

She laced her fingers through his and pulled his arm tighter around her. "I love you, too."

The End

_Reviews are greatly appreciated!_


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